Copyright Helene Anne Fortin
My mind is a powerful place. It can heal me. It can also make me sick.
One morning I looked at my toes and realized that many of them were turning black or very dark blue!
Prior to this, I had noticed redness on certain toes on my left foot but now the whole mess had “jumped” to my right foot and the color had darkened suddenly. It did not look good.
My first thought: panic.
I consulted my Western medical doctor who took photos of my “interesting” toes and sent me off for a myriad of tests. All negative so far. I was thankful that she took such action.
As I calmed, my second thought was to look at what was happening to me through a Classical Chinese Medicine (C.C.M.) lens.
Putting on my C.C.M. detective hat I started asking questions (I would normally ask of a client) to help narrow down my approach to my toe mess.
Was my body running hot or cold? Definitely cold. Over a long period of time. Probably a decade at least. I had to admit that this was a chronic condition.
Cold in Chinese Medicine is one of the six pathogenic factors that plays havoc within a body. Along with wind, dampness, dryness, summer heat and heat these conditions impact the body’s ability to heal, to balance, to achieve wellness.
Cold can enter the body from the exterior but it can also be anything that damages/harms/contracts or is injurious to yang (the warming moving qi in my body.)
In C.C.M., cold is an interesting pathogenic factor as it has not only a physical impact, it has deep emotional connections as well.
Think of your body when it is cold: it wants to curl up into a ball. There is a preference for little movement, even a reticence to do so.
I love how Chinese Medicine understands the causation and repair of a body’s illness/disease. Especially its deep knowledge of the interplay between the physical and emotional.
So I ask myself: What was my emotional state as the color of my toes quickly worsened and spread?
Truth be told here in Canada we have been dealing with a great deal of turmoil about our future as a country. I realize I have been worrying and overthinking and even fearful, angry and frustrated at times.
Usually, I can keep a handle on my excess emotions as I know well the damage it can do to my health through my C.C.M. training. But I too (like many) have been caught up in the media bombardment over the recent political mayhem.
Have my over-zealous emotions weakened my immune system? Yes. Combine that with the long term deep-set cold and I have a wee bit of a mess on my hands. (oops toes!)
One of the reasons I am so impressed with Classical Chinese Medicine’s approach to healing with energy is that it can reverse many illnesses by following the right steps (e.g., change to dietary and emotional patterns, belief systems, etc.)
So my first step was to put a stop to my incessant worry/overthinking/fear and to redirect that destructive/damaging energy elsewhere.
Second: I must warm the body. I remove all cold or raw from the diet. Then ditch all stimulants. (I am already over-stimulated!) Third: shift the diet to warming foods: warming spices such as ginger, cinnamon; warming meats; warming teas.
In Classical Chinese Medicine all healing must first come from the diet as getting the digestive tract functioning well the body then can kick-start the healing process. I also decide to supplement with Chinese herbs.
I also must address the elephant in the room: Why has it taken me a decade or longer to address the problem of “cold” in my body?
Cold goes deep and creates stagnation in body qi. It affects the movement of blood, lymph, fluids. Equally cold can parallel the lack of movement forward in one’s life in general. Have I been limiting my movements? My life? Oh yes!
WOW! No wonder I didn’t want to address the “cold” issue. Well, the black toes have got me moving. I recognize I need to change.
In the wise words of my world-renowned C.C.M. teacher Jeffrey Yuen: “All diseases are diseases of the spirit.” By “spirit” Jeffrey means the calm within. I ask myself: When did I last feel at peace? Not in a long time I realize.
How to warm the toes? With moxa (moxibustion) sticks. In Chinese Medicine, moxibustion has been used for over a 1000 years to help break down cold in the body.
It is a stick of compressed herbs (i.e., mugwort leaves) – lit like a cigar – that I hold about an inch from my toes where meridians begin/end. This warms the body and removes blockages along meridians lines (pathways of energy.)
The vision of the human body in C.C.M. is simply an extension of what is lived outside. Cold outside can become cold inside. For years I realize I have been keeping my studio very cold, bundling up instead with sweaters. Good to a point but this constant cold is now playing havoc with my health.
Cold (linked to the Element of Water) deals with the emotion of fear. How long has ‘fear’ been my ‘go to’ emotion?
Today the “fear” was triggered by Canada’s political situation. But, in reality, ‘fear’ has been a pretty constant companion for decades for other reasons. I finally see this long-standing pattern.
The opposite of fear is TRUST. At what level am I trusting in the Universe or have I gotten to the point of not believing that everything will be ok?
Over the past few weeks with the media mayhem, I became fearful. I think I lost faith… in myself, in others, in the Universe’s ability to find the right balance no matter how off-balance things appeared to be.
As one who believes in the powerful use of creativity as a healing tool, I pick up my brushes and let the paint fly on a canvas to release this fear, this sense of hopelessness. I finish and the canvas is covered in paint: blood red, deep blue (like my toes) and white. Stark. Angry.
Through this process my body starts to release the pent-up emotions from today, from the past.
I then turn to the toes. Blood stagnation there. Cold there. I start to moxa my toes daily.
I know well that my body’s health is a metaphor as to how well I live my life and work at my own healing.
My black toes and introspection and my training in Classical Chinese Medicine (C.C.M.) have given me my recipe to heal through this long-standing cold. Yes, it will take time. But because I will work with my gifted energy practitioner what might take years in therapy can happen quickly. Now that this knowledge has come to consciousness. Now that my willingness to address this issue and to implement change are there.
The rest is energy work, working in Classical Chinese Medicine and the ancient lines of energy, the Divergent Channels and the Eight Extraordinary Vessels, I can revisit that original belief as to why that “cold” was necessary. As I have come to learn, my body never makes mistakes and always works in my best interests at the time.
These “ancient patterns” or “beliefs” (as I call them) can even start in utero and are reinforced by unaware parents. This is the work I do too with my clients. Healing the past so that we can live a happier, gentler life today, with more freedom, more focus, more joy.
How are my toes you ask? Even after just a few weeks of implementing my recipe (see Sidebar below for my recipe) they are mostly pinkish with a few dabs of dark red. The heat and crazy burning I was experiencing completely disappeared almost the instant I started to moxa.
Now is time to heal my soul/my spirit and let go that erroneous belief planted so long ago: that I needed cold for protection of the body, of the mind.
Today my body feels warmer most of the time. The “ice-hand” – my right one – is quite warm right now.
I heal slowly. Hey, I am a human learning to be even more humane. Taking my healing back into myself.
The toes? Well sometimes they are still cold. But when they are: I put an extra log on the fire. I drink warming cinnamon tea and light my moxa stick and, especially, ensure that my mind, my dear mind, is at peace.
Wishing you peace always
Love from Wakefield Quebec Canada
Helene Anne Fortin
SIDEBAR #1
The Shang Han Lun – Treatise on Cold Damage
Compiled in 220 AD, the Shang Han Lun – Treatise on Cold Damaging Diseases– is a foundational text in Chinese Medicine. It was compiled by Zhang Zhongjing and still emitting wisdom about cold damage 2000 years later.
The 800-page translation, in use today, is the oldest surviving clinical handbook in Chinese Medicine history. Its wisdom and understanding of cold damage echoes into tomorrow.
SIDEBAR #2
Helene Anne Fortin’s Personal Recipe for Cold Damage
Each body is unique and tells a story through illness/disease/discomfort. In my case: black toes. Here’s my personal recipe to aid in my body’s recovery.
Note: In Classical Chinese Medicine, each person’s recipe for healing will be unique based on a client’s personality, the Yin and Yang deficiencies/surpluses and their story. It is all about your body’s willingness to heal, to change that are key to resolution.
Teas – I drink lots of ginger and cinnamon teas (e.g., cinnamon stick and real ginger, boiling water.)
Salt – I ensure the body has adequate. (Salt is the taste for Water Element recovery.)
Food – I make home-made warming soups (bone broth ideal) and eat cooked foods only. Nothing raw. No processed foods till I heal nor any sugars nor caffeine till then too. I eliminate hot spices such as chilies (too stimulating for the body – I am needing warming only.)
Qigong/Taichi– Daily, if possible, to rebuild lost yang (warming/moving) energy.
Quell excess emotions – I calm my emotions via brisk movement (walking) or creativity in all its forms (painting, writing, etc.)
Media access/excess – I remove or limit the internet or media if offensive or too stimulating.
Moxa – I moxa the ends of my fingers and toes to restore deep warmth and encourage energy movement.
I work with a C.C.M. energy practitioner and the ancient energy channels to seek out the erroneous beliefs that ignited this cold pattern in the first place.
Rug up – I keep my neck, head, back and feet warm, all year round till I heal.
Finally, I commit to change, determined to realign and to live in Gratitude and Trust.
Helene Anne Fortin, Wakefield Quebec Canada
Helene Anne Fortin • kind mentor 